We’re always told by kind and caring teachers that “there’s no such thing as a stupid question.” And while this sentiment can be helpful in classrooms to ensure students feel safe, there comes a point in our lives where we learn that there actually are dumb questions. And we should probably keep them between us and Google…
One curious Reddit user recently asked others to share the dumbest things they’ve ever heard people say, and boy, did they deliver. From ignorant assumptions about history to blatant medical misinformation, there’s no end to what people will say stupid things about. Enjoy scrolling through these replies that might make you feel like a genius, and be sure to upvote the ones that make you facepalm!
Listen beautiful relax classics on our Youtube channel.
This involves a conversation with a guy I used to work with who was trying to lose weight so he was cutting down on pasta.
Him : I’ve been doing pretty good, haven’t had pasta in 2 weeks.
Me : That’s awesome, what’s that you got in your hand there?
Him : Mac and Cheese.
Me : I thought you said you haven’t had pasta in 2 weeks?
Him : I haven’t, this is Mac and cheese.
Image credits: highfivesforgod
“My chiropractor can cure autism with his bare hands and some essential oils.” Too bad her chiropractor couldn’t cure stupid.
Image credits: Weedhopper24
That there’s no difference between turkey and ham because “they both come from birds.”
I guess pigs really do fly in their world.
Image credits: JustForKicks36
Someone in our group lost a flip flop in a river, we watched it float down stream.
Another person in our group said to be patient because it’ll eventually do a full loop and come back.
Image credits: herpaderp_maplesyrup
I dated a girl who thought sea horses were the size of regular horses. She was so disappointed at the aquarium
Image credits: hdycta-weddingcake
*a new hire at the cotton mill that had dropped out of school to go to work*
“How long do we get off for spring break?”
Listen beautiful relax classics on our Youtube channel.
Image credits: TrailerParkPrepper
“Salmonella is only caused by salmon. You’re a chef you should know that”
“Well she never got pregnant before” after his gf got pregnant and after asking my friend why didn’t he use protection.
Image credits: tuotone75
“How long does it take the meat to grow back on a cow when you shave it off?”
Image credits: Bright_Ad_2848
“What year did this happen?”
We were watching the Lord of the Rings
Image credits: OverTheCandlestik
Was on the bus headed to class in Honolulu, a Southerner got on and asked the driver,
“Do y’all take American Dollars?”
The driver pointed at the American flag sticker on the window and with extreme exasperation said,
“You’re in America.”
Image credits: revjor
I was microwaving some food, I hit the 1 so it would automatically cook it for a minute. My friend asked “Why did you put it in for a minute? I usually put mine in for 60 seconds”. I had to explain to him that it’s the same thing. We were in high school.
Image credits: Gambit_Finale
“You have your facts and I’ll have my facts”
Image credits: anon12xyz
“I’m allergic to oxygen.”
I asked if they meant to say ‘oxycodone’ and they insisted, no, they were allergic to oxygen.
Image credits: dragonfeet1
If you drink a coke & then a diet coke, the sugar cancels out.
Image credits: ScribblingOff87
I was talking with a man from Pakistan and he asked me what my core beliefs were. I said my core beliefs were rooted in science and he responded with ‘OH SCIENCE, so all you care about is plastic surgery boob jobs.’ He took the entire field of science and labeled it as ‘boob jobs’.
Image credits: Physical-Song-3898
When I was working a customer service job a lady was verifying her serial number and said Z as in xylophone. My brain literally shut off for about 10 seconds.
A manager at my old job thought Alaska was an island next to Hawaii, because that’s what it looks like on a map.
Also asked me one day if you could get an std from breathing the same air as someone with an std.
There were more but I can’t remember the rest.
And this person was in charge…
Image credits: DaveBelmont
These fireworks are wet. I’m gonna dry them off in the microwave.
Image credits: EmotionalMycologist9
“People in England knew about the Queen’s passing before we did (Americans) because of the time difference!”
Meaning that because of the time difference, English people are somehow 6-8 hours AHEAD in the future??
“I don’t have a girlfriend because females are too intimidated because of my career.”
He was an assistant manager at Outback Steakhouse.
Image credits: DauxRaeMeMeMe
“This steak tastes just like beef”
Image credits: DigiDee
Years ago, I found myself watching MTV “Street Smarts” with a man I had recently met. The question asked on the show was to put these events in chronological order from oldest to most recent, the events were: Civil War, Man on the Moon, Ice Age. I laughed, I joked what a ridiculous question it was, he didn’t seem the least amused, so I asked him, you know this, right? He replied, “I’m not good with dates”
Image credits: bigshotz76
Asked for diet water on a plane
Image credits: Icy_mane
I didn’t take the promotion, because I would be paying too much in taxes.
I was solving a Rubik’s cube and a guy asked me how many sides it has and if I can make them all blue
Image credits: MrLambNugget
“Am I going to be accountable for everything I say?!”
-Overheard my old boss berating the rest of the staff in a shop I used to work at
Image credits: savedbytheblood72
“Its forbidden to smoke indoors now, but immigrants are allowed to live!”
She was dead serious.
I am hardly ever speechless, but that was one of these rare occasions.
Image credits: Moedrynk
You can’t get pregnant if you are on top
Image credits: Content_Pool_1391
I knew someone who thought the sun and the moon were the same thing. She was 18 and just graduated high school.
Image credits: AaronD1986
I dated a girl who thought “the hole in the ozone layer are where the space shuttle come through to land.”
Image credits: Father_Bones
When I worked at Starbucks it was frequent question from customers to explain the difference between a hot and an iced drink…
Image credits: Real_Pea5921
“Anyone else not able to sleep at night? Yeah, I don’t think I’m turnal” took me a few to realize she thought the term was “not turnal”
Somewhat recently a girl told me me there is a conspiracy between big milk and big electric in the united states. That you don’t actually have to refrigerate milk but they tell us we have to so they can make more money on electric bills.
I tried to explain what pasteurization was, but goddamn its disturbing that she was just like “yehp this makes the most sense”
Birds aren’t animals.
Rep Hank Johnson (D-GA) who thought the island of Guam might tip over if too many people got on one side.
I was talking to a patient and I asked them which arm was injured.
They said “my left your right”
I was talking to them on the phone.
“nobody knows who the second man on the moon was”
That was a sales manager giving one of those motivational speeches to his entire team.
Hmmm…. Got a couple from my days working in tourism in Hawaii. One of my favorites was “what’s the difference between your mushroom and Swiss burger and your bacon guacamole burger? “. Next one, for context for those that don’t know Maui, you can see two different islands from multiple vantage points on the island. Anyway, we had stopped at a lookout for some tourists to take a picture and a guy being completely serious asked, “So which one is Japan?”. I was like, Japan is about 3k miles to the northwest. If you can see it, you have superpowers, sir.
Image credits: boardjock
I once heard someone say they believe the old lady from the Titanic movie is an actual titanic survivor. When I told them she’s an actress, they tried to call me bluff
Image credits: GaryLooiCW
That 16 year olds should be allowed to drink and drive.
They spent at least 10 minutes trying to legitimately defend this point to a room of adults.
The individual making the point was in her late 20s
Image credits: Refurbished_beast