PaxEast is one of the most celebrated gaming conventions for nerds–gamers, I meant gamers! This year, the organizers of the event took it to the next level by introducing Pwnmeal, an oatmeal breakfast made for gamers. The promotional site advertised four different flavors including ‘strawberry’ and a rather sinister ‘Carnage’ flavor.
According to the illustration on the site, “Don’t let hunger spawncamp you. Drop the hammer with Pwnmeal Extreme Gaming Oatmeal. It’s a PWN or BE PWN’d world out there. Only a n00b would skip breakfast, the most important meal of the day. When you visit cyberspace to play your favorite shoot ‘em ups or massively multiplayer online video games, ensure decisive victory with our extreme porridge. Now listen up gamers: we’re not legally allowed to say that Pwnmeal XGO will make you better at video games. You’ll have to ask yourself how a hearty serving of fiber, real fruit flavoring, and a lower blood cholesterol level will help you and your clan.”