Once again, Barry Petchesky combed through the database of the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission for emergency room visits involving things people got stuck in their orifices and needed medical intervention to remove. His annual list is categorized by orifice, from top to bottom (literally), and sometimes includes the doctor’s notes.
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“PUT PIECES OF STYROFOAM CUP IN NOSTRIL. HE WAS SEEN YESTERDAY FOR SAME THING”
“MOM TOLD THE KIDS TO CLEAN UP THEIR MONOPOLY GAME PATIENT CAME TO MOM CRYING SAYS SHE SWALLOWED THE SHOE”
“WAS CHEWING ON A BATTERY WHEN HE POSSIBLY SWALLOWED PART OF IT, ALSO WITH A POPCORN KERNEL IN RIGHT EAR”
Eating: you’re doing it wrong. The notes for the more embarrassing orifices are even funnier, as you might have guessed. Read the complete list at Defector. You may have to log in with your email, but if you get in and are brave enough, there’s a second article titled What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year? -via Metafilter
See the lists from previous years, too.
Source: neatorama