This Online Group Is Dedicated To The ‘Rarest Threats Across The Web’, Here Are 87 Of The Best Ones

Life on Planet Earth usually isn’t like it is in fictional stories: it’s often messy, chaotic, and full of friction and frustration. It’s only natural then, that People Don’t Get Along Very Well. Egos get bruised, ambitions clash, and people argue for hours on social media. As a result, some folks can no longer contain their anger and resort to name-calling or worse—threats. Oh, but we’re not talking about your regular internet insults and digital threats here. No, Pandas, what we have in store for you today is far more shocking and creative.

Welcome to r/Rarethreats. The online community shares the rarest threats, warnings, and insults to ever grace the net. The posts are ominous and practically ooze danger (sometimes with a small side-order of humor). It’s a real treat for anyone who’s a fan of wordplay or simply wants to stock their arsenal with some great ideas to confuse and amuse their opponents. Scroll down for the best posts from r/Rarethreats, and tell us which of these intimidated you the most in the comments. Seriously, the creativity here is astounding—we’ve never enjoyed being threatened so much.

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Bored Panda got in touch with the moderator team at r/Rarethreats, and redditor u/Left4pillz was kind enough to answer our questions about the history of the community, the life of a mod, and what the secret behind a great threat is. Check out what they told us below, Pandas.

#1 Don’t Cross Him

Image credits: @trumpetcake

#2 I’ll Freaking Disable You

Image credits: scheherazade0125

#3 Who’s The Right Person?!

Image credits: ivotedhillary1

Moderator u/Left4pillz had a friendly chat with Bored Panda about r/Rarethreats and its origins. They revealed to us that the post that started it all was a man’s threat on social media to tape more fish to ATMs until they were fixed. You can find that post right over here. The situation was so bizarre that it formed the “original start of the sub.”

Bored Panda was interested in getting the mod team’s opinion about the biggest challenges that they face when managing the community.

According to moderator u/Left4pillz, it’s time. Or rather, the lack of it. And it’s an issue that affects the moderators of all subreddits.

#4 Idk If This Exactly Fits Here But I Found It Funny

Image credits: AudreyHW

#5 I’m Officially Scared

Image credits: NoYou1120

#6 Sent This To A Friend Of Mine On Snapchat

Image credits: wwwdotihavenolife

“Between my job as a cycle courier, and the hobby of porting and recreating older videogame maps for Pavlov VR, I don’t really have much time to spend moderating here. Thankfully, the report system makes it easy enough to see the posts that break the rules more easily without having to spend tons of time looking at every post,” the mod explained how Reddit’s system makes it easier to manage online communities and catch instances of rule-breaking.

Mod u/Left4pillz shared their opinion about what makes a good online threat, one that’s worth sharing on the sub. “Creativity and brevity,” they said, are the key to quality. So you’ll want to avoid posts and threats that “go on for paragraphs.” Humor is always a plus, as well!

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“Generally the best posts are threats/warnings that are found naturally, rather than ones made specifically for the sub. And IMO the real best of the best ones are found in real life as they’re typically much rarer, like these two,” the mod said, referring to two posts over here and over here.

#7 Don’t Leave Your Kids Here

Image credits: Left4pillz

#8 Who Hurt You

Image credits: jamilDK

#9 No One Out Pizzas The Hut

Image credits: Bastard37484739

The ‘Rare Threats’ subreddit has weathered a few years already, having been founded in early 2019. Since then, the community has grown to house 58.8k members who love sharing the freshest and most bizarre threats they spot while strolling through the digital landscape.

If you spend enough time on the internet, you’re bound to see and read some really weird drek. What helps us keep what remains of our faith in humanity is the fact that among all of the ‘super important’ jousting and rage-filled dueling we see on social media, there are some very self-aware individuals who put humor above everything. A simple insult or rebuttal just won’t do. They go the extra mile.

These people take the time to craft delightful responses that are so unusual that their opponents have no choice but to one-up them. Others are just so brutal and shockingly specific that there’s no way forward except to lay down your arms, change your name and address, and move to some remote corner of the world.

#10 Attack Mode: E N G A G E D

Image credits: MLG50

#11 Don’t Comment Ok Boomer Please

Image credits: @chadloder

#12 A Sign I Found At A Restaurant Some Days Ago. Sorry For The Potato Quality, My Phones Camera Is Garbage

Image credits: ClairLestrange

The moderator team running r/RareThreats has a set of ground rules for the members of the subreddit. Obviously, the posts you share have to be related to the main topic of the sub. In other words, if it’s not a rare threat or warning, it shouldn’t be shared in the community. Avoid low-effort nonsense, aim for quality instead.

The mods also urge community members to avoid reposting content. Meanwhile, posters should crop their pics ‘appropriately’ which means there shouldn’t be any reaction comments after the threat in the image itself.

#13 It Ain’t A Dog Park

Image credits: Left4pillz

#14 Pukicho Back At It Again

Image credits: AmberMetalicScorpion

#15 I’m Scared And Aroused

Image credits: Julian_JmK

What’s more, if the content isn’t safe for work or civilized company, it should be marked as such. Spoilers for movies and games have to be tagged, too. In other words, be aware of others, not just yourself.

And speaking of keeping the audience in mind, anyone posting on r/Rarethreats has to make sure that the text in the image is readable. “This means no deep-fried posts, and no text too small to read. Non-English threats are fine, but must have a translation in the image,” the mods write in the sub’s sidebar.

#16 Really Proud Of This One

Image credits: Mild_microvav

#17 I’m Sorry Please Forgive Me!!!

Image credits: SharquishaTBO

#18 That’s Scary

Image credits: Bange-roni

This type of content can see a lot of popularity online. For instance, another subreddit, r/rareinsults has 2.2 million members and focuses on—yup, you guessed it!—rare insults.

Redditor u/Blank-Cheque, one of the mods at r/rareinsults, told Bored Panda a while back that cursing has its upsides. “Cursing has been observed by scientists to alleviate pain, and insult-like gestures have been observed by researchers even in chimpanzees,” they said.

#19 Ex-Post From /R/Rareinsults

Image credits: King0fDairyQueen

#20 He’s Got A Point

Image credits: J_Anders99

#21 Cold Blooded

Image credits: freddyfan1235

“Professor Frans de Waal said that angry chimpanzees ‘will grunt or spit or make an abrupt, upsweeping gesture that, if a human were to do it, you’d recognize it as aggressive’ in order to avoid conflict, rather than to escalate it. He continues that a ‘chimpanzee who is really gearing up for a fight doesn’t waste time with gestures, but just goes ahead and attacks.’ [Insults] are a part of life, and a world without them would be extremely different to ours to a degree which cannot be simply explained.”

Of course, this is in no way a suggestion to hurl insults in public; it’s a rude thing to do. But recognizing the fine wordplay in them, threats, and warnings online? That’s perfectly fine.

#22 Not The Fridge

Image credits: Shower-karaoke-star

#23 Please Flush

Image credits: reddit.com

#24 This Was Supposed To Be Funny. It’s Horrifying

Image credits: Thespanishirishman

According to one study, swearing actually increased pain tolerance and decreased the perceived pain of people, as compared to those who didn’t swear. One additional thing that the researchers found was that men who tended to catastrophize (i.e. those who saw situations as far worse than they actually were) did not benefit from these benefits.

At the same time, you’ve got to keep in mind that constantly living in anger is an absolutely horrible thing for your health. Constant anger can lead to various cardiovascular problems, metabolic diseases, as well as digestive issues! In short, you have to let go of your anger, sooner or later. Or your body and mind will suffer.

#25 Just Happened To Me In Among Us

Image credits: omerty37

#26 Pukicho Is Enraged

Image credits: Nevphion

#27 I’m Concerned And Confused On How This Is Possible

Image credits: Joey-Drew1927

Meanwhile, if you do end up wanting to show off your verbal sparring skills on social media some time, why not consider using some old insults that have fallen out of use? You’re almost sure to confuse your opponents immensely if you call them a mumpsimus (someone who’s stubborn), a ninnyhammer (aka a fool), a milksop (someone who’s pampered), a lickspittle (that’s a suck-up), or a cockalorum (basically, a boastful, strutting, self-important individual). If they have to Google what you called them, then they’ve already lost!

Oh, and for those of you Pandas who are into fantasy and Dungeons & Dragons, here are two fun dwarven insult generators over here and right here. Enjoy!

#28 Hey Macaroni

Image credits: Left4pillz

#29 Merry Christmas Everyone!

Image credits: Left4pillz

#30 A Nice Golf Course

Image credits: Left4pillz

#31 W- What

Image credits: supjoshlol

#32 This

Image credits: Cinnamon_Breadroll

#33 An Email You Don’t Want To Be Getting

Image credits: czarofel

#34 Elementary School Vibes

Image credits: NineSidedEnneagon

#35 Cursed Shoelaces

Image credits: nourelhalaby

#36 Gotta Say I’ve Never Seen This Before

Image credits: Killerwill9000

#37 Felt This Belonged Here

Image credits: abermea

#38 This Threat Is Entirely Justified

Image credits: FauxRowsdower

#39 He’s Mad Because I Didn’t Call Him

Image credits: Art-MusicTrash

#40 You’ve Done It Now Josh

Image credits: Thatoneguy4314

#41 Good Luck Cleaning

Image credits: Left4pillz

#42 A Pretty Light Threat

Image credits: Left4pillz

#43 Drowning Your Whole Country Saliva

Image credits: tabanhere

#44 Maybe A Little Common, But Quite Effective

Image credits: IllNovel5044

#45 Why The Bible?

Image credits: Kesso_Hikari

#46 Your Bones Shall Become Pancake!

Image credits: EmeraldHuntsman

#47 What Do You People Have Against Light Mode?

Image credits: CygnusX06

#48 Godot Is Sick Of Gumshoe’s Mistakes

Image credits: Secret-Italian

#49 Not The Pufferfish

Image credits: afishnamedflipp

#50 Ow

Image credits: USS-Iowa

#51 I Mean…how Do You Respond To This?

Image credits: GlitchGaminggirl

#52 We All Got Rickrolled. Strong Opinions Were Had

Image credits: LordMeme42

#53 Oreo Threat

Image credits: ShisuiLael

#54 Damn Bro Chill

Image credits: reddit.com

#55 Man Said He Was Gonna Name His Son V*gina So I Had To Act

Image credits: MumflrFlumperdink

#56 Sunnyd Is Getting Serious

Image credits: WastingSomeTimeAgain

#57 Happened On A Discord Server

Image credits: ur_mom_rekt

#58 Oh God No

Image credits: reddit.com

#59 This Was In My Dc Server

Image credits: Some_random_user69

#60 Capri Sun

Image credits: Left4pillz

#61 For The Sake Of Your Health, Please Do Not Insult Axolotls

Image credits: poplarleaves

#62 The Best Way To Cut A Sandwich

Image credits: Left4pillz

#63 Gotta Go Fast

Image credits: Aggravating-Ad-952

#64 Go Kart Go Vroom

Image credits: Neff38

#65 Beware, It’s Angry

Image credits: tha_foot_lettuce

#66 Handshake

Image credits: ericcc211

#67 Does This Count?

Image credits: Mumbil1

#68 I’ve Found My New Favorite Kind Of Threat

Image credits: Lamp_Sauce

#69 This Is Rare

Image credits: reddit.com

#70 Someone Told Me To Post It Here

Image credits: parker4742

#71 Never Zero, Brother. Never Zero

Image credits: Ella_NutEllaDraws

#72 Rick And Mortar

Image credits: Left4pillz

#73 Discord Is Great For These Things

Image credits: StarSpangledDingD0ng

#74 Love My Smp Server

Image credits: SouthDetroitIsntReal

#75 Oh Boy

Image credits: reddit.com

#76 I Left Her On Read And I Get This S**t. Please Send Help

Image credits: Rayzedark

#77 Don’t Dislike His Video

Image credits: PM_Me_Nudes7

#78 Poor Fingers

Image credits: AdventurePPlayz

#79 I Sent Him A Picture Of A Dog. This Is Kinda Uncalled For

Image credits: Hwachxe

#80 Toko: A Well-Written But Annoying Character

Image credits: transbastard

#81 After Sending Some Cringe Shit

Image credits: reznorandross

#82 “Sus”

Image credits: hi-dad-im-son

#83 A Creep Has Fallen Into The River In LEGO City

Image credits: freddyfan1235

#84 I Think I Got A Little Angry. [01/04/2021]

Image credits: llvpqvll

#85 He Knows Not To Text Me That

Image credits: Lopsided-Task9818

#86 I’m Scared Man I-

Image credits: marker_king

#87 Man I Love Discord

Image credits: NuclearMagpie

Source: boredpanda.com

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