Traditionally, bouncers have been blokes. Big blokes. Burly blokes. Big burly blokes who squeeze themselves into waistcoats and earpieces (which equate to instant, elevated importance, obviously). Men with hands the size of saucepans who presumably get into bed with their walkie talkies at the other end, to sleep soundly after another night spent separating the super-club wheat from the nightlife chaff outside a branch of Oceana.