Aristotle believed that all things in nature contain “something of the marvelous.”

However, Reddit user Massive_Quit_7844 was interested in the opposite — our egotistical side. So they made a post on the platform, asking “What’s the most unethical life hack you know?”

But as you go through the answers, remember that we already have research, telling us that being a jerk doesn’t help us get ahead. So use them at your own risk!

#1

Work correspondence hack:

Anything that benefits you, put it in an email, letter, etc. so it can be memorialized when possible. 

Anything that is detrimental to you, make a call or discuss the issue face to face verbally.  Don’t leave a paper trail. .

Image credits: waitwutok

#2

When you call in sick to work, call lying down as it makes you sound more congested.

Image credits: Blurt-Reynolds

#3

If you shop around at garage sales or good will, some brands offer lifetime warranties.

Image credits: FunCouple037

#4

If you want to lie, make a part of the lie something shameful. Everybody will believe you.

Image credits: Oil-Executive

#5

Wear black carpenter pants, black polo, multi tool, flash light and a clipboard. Walk with purpose. Get you backstage 90% of the time.

Image credits: azorianmilk

#6

If you get in a one-car accident, or fall asleep whilst driving, etc., tell the responding police that you “swerved to avoid an animal.”.

Image credits: Mature_BOS

#7

If you rob a bank you have almost guaranteed shelter regardless of the outcome.

Image credits: MiguelSalaOp

#8

Have a large, “professional” looking camera. Get a bright vest that says “press” on it. Make an ID. Go to town. Almost free access anywhere.

Image credits: Xtereo

#9

Educate childs using dog training techniques.

Image credits: MYTHGUNDAM

#10

If you run for Congress, you get government briefings, some of them confidential, then you can trade stocks on the info.

Image credits: Disco425

#11

Girl Scout cookies are able to be resold easily. Girl Scouts are terrible at spotting counterfeit currency.

Image credits: ArchaicBrainWorms

#12

If you’re looking for parking and you ended up somewhere where rows of cars got fined, just pull up, park your car, walk over to one of those cars, take the fine from their windscreen and put it on yours. Enjoy your day. .

Image credits: BerakGoreng

#13

You can avoid getting a parking ticket by taking one from an already fined car and putting in on yours.

Image credits: TheBibliotaph

#14

Re-gifting presents as ‘timeless heirlooms’.

Image credits: Kuroinekou

#15

Using billions in tax payer federally funded research to create medications and then turn around and charge those same tax payers a 1000 fold increase in costs WHILE also getting tax cuts myself from the very middle man politicians who give me the public funds. Oh but wait – one important caveat, why do these politicians help me out so much? because of course I get ultra rich, but they want their cut, their political campaign donation of course, from the very pool of profits I made off their constituents tax payer money!, Bwahahahahhaa – “EVIL LAUGH”.

Image credits: Minute_Butterfly9382

#16

For ubereats, mcdonalds, burger king, etc start like 20-30 accounts on their apps. Once they realize you have been inactive for a period of time they will almost always give you offers for free food, or like a burger for a dollar or whatever. Because i have so many accounts i can check through them and there is almost always ways for me to get a full meal for about 3-4 bucks at most. You can also use multiple accounts at the same time to make different orders and pick them up all at once if you really want a lot of basically free food, but thats a little more risky.

Ubereats regularly sends me 25 dollars off orders of 25 or more for the first order on a new account if i dont order anything on that account for a bit. Now you cant use the same card you have used on other accounts so you have to buy a cheap prepaid card each time.

If done right it ends up being like 20 dollars off any order of 25 because of the cost of purchasing the prepaid card. I do this regularly and order exactly 25 dollars of food which ends up being 5 dollars+fees+tip. Generally means i get to order 25 dollars of food from any restaurant for around 15 bucks all fees and tip included vs the 40+ it would be normally. Cheaper than going there or picking it up myself.

15 bucks for enough food to feed 3 people and have it delivered is pretty awesome. It takes a few steps but honestly not more than just starting a new email address and a quick stop on the way home for a cheap prepaid gift card.

For the accounts you have already used your first order deal on they will still send 40% off 3 orders of 25 dollars or more almost consistently on accounts that havent been used in a few weeks and i always have one on deck if the girlfriend and i want to order food on the weekend.

Image credits: Panderverse

#17

Pay for one movie ticket, stay in cinema all day. Works almost always everywhere.

Image credits: Klendatu_

#18

If you’re planning on calling out sick, schedule an email about it at a weird time early in the morning. People don’t doubt it when they think you were up at 4:37 am vomiting.

Then if you need to physically call, you can do that later and have written documentation that you were “up all night vomiting” or whatever.

Image credits: blackholesymposium

#19

Bluffing on your resume about trending skills & experience – although make sure you are well-versed in the skills & aware of the fake experience.

Image credits: Alter_Ego_Single_17

#20

On a trip to Las Vegas, I decided to visit their adult pool area at the Delano. Upon paid entry, they provided me a bright neon wristband. I also happened to be attending a Red Hot Chili Peppers show the same night and still had my pool wristband on when I entered the venue.

While trying to navigate to my seating area, I asked the usher for directions to get to my seat.
Well, they didn’t look too closely at the ticket location on my phone and only noticed my wristband. The next thing I knew, I was being directed into the VIP access area right up front.

Apparently, the VIP wristband was the same color, so I was able to enjoy the show as a VIP.

Image credits: billoweb

#21

You can get into most places by wearing a maintenance uniform i.e cover alls a construction helmet+ vest and carrying a tool box or ladder. I would recommend a respirator and gloves. No more movie tickets needed.

Image credits: dragonboysam

#22

I worked at a grocery store and saw the same 3 people show up all the time and steal stuff. The manager said there aren’t even recordings for the cameras and they don’t care if people steal. I started treating myself to lunch after that.

Image credits: MistakeMysterious347

#23

I have lied thru my teeth every time I have been sat on a jury to get out of it. Works every time.

Image credits: Quiet_Ad328

#24

To quit smoking cigarettes, know that you can’t smoke if you’re asleep. It is extremely hard to give up nicotine, so I just bought a bottle of z quill and knocked myself out. I’d wake up feeling like s**t and groggy, but as soon as the craving came along, I just knocked myself out again. 

It’s probably not the “healthy” way to quit, but it’s healthier than being a smoker your whole life. I only did this for about 3 days, and after that you’re over the hump. You don’t feel the discomfort or the cravings if youre asleep all day. .

#25

Just before covid my son worked at a multi national that had posh reception areas with coffee machines, large tv’s running the companies products and advances all day and always smart receptionists.

One day a van pulls up with three blokes in it, all in hi viz and clean smart workwear, they show their work order to the receptionist and get on with removing 4 x 70” tv screens and a projector all for upgrades and replacements.

To this day, neither the blokes, van or tv’s have been seen again.

Just walk out like you own it comes to mind.

The receptionists were not sacked but from then on every one who came to that facility had to be checked properly.

Image credits: vossmanspal

#26

In the self-checkout aisle, you call the shots. Organic pears become regular pears. Organic apples become regular pears. Organic meat becomes regular pears; if you tear off the bar code.

The scanner is just a mindless machine, take control of your own destiny.

Image credits: karajoyxoxo

#27

I buy a lot of things on Amazon. And it happened that the delivery status doesn’t work. So I got my package in my mailbox but Amazon sent a message saying that, as my package is late/or lost I can ask for a refund of it. I did it a few times so I got some pretty good stuff for free.

#28

Flights around 9/11 are cheaper ?.

Image credits: redstarzer06ix

#29

If I break something that is still available for sale, I go buy a new one, then return the broken one with the new receipt a day later, saying it only lasted a day. I’ve used this for video game controllers, toasters, blenders, vaccums, and a lot of items.

The store never questions it, and I get a new item for very little effort and no additional cost.

Image credits: xsvspd81

#30

Wear a generic shirt, jeans, and boots. Put on a safety vest. Carry a 6ft ladder. You just got access to damn near anywhere. Just say you’re “Auditing the camera system” and you basically have free run of most places.

Source – I’m an electrician, and never get questioned unless I’m going into a bank vault.

#31

Pretty unethical but also pretty harmless: if you’re ever out and about and forgot your sunglasses, go to any grocery store customer service counter and say “Did anyone turn in some black (or whatever) sunglasses?” They will proceed to dump a literal pile of lost sunglasses in front of you. Look decisive so as to not draw suspicion.

#32

Road signs are free you can just take em!

Image credits: LaLiLuLela

#33

Petty judgemental attitude towards others to make you forget your low self esteem . Unethical but way too common.

Image credits: slayclaycrash

#34

Back in the day I worked for Jerry’s subs and pizza for a few months running deliveries, it wasn’t uncommon that folks would call in pick up orders and just never show. At closing time it was up for grabs so on weekends my friends would call in a decent sized pick up order 30 mins before we closed and I’d show up to hang with the bros with eats in tow.

#35

You can replace every ‘e’ in a word document with ‘е’, the Cyrillic equivalent. Looks identical to us but computers read it as a separate character. It’s such a common letter that when replaced, it scrambles the text and lets you get through plagiarism/AI detectors. 

For fun, copy/paste this modified word into Google and see what results you get: расе.

#36

To get more ice cream at a shop, order a single scoop first then change your mind and tell them 2 scoops instead. The scoop for the second will be bigger if not same to match the first scoop.

#37

For entry level / lower level jobs, lie on your resume. Most places don’t have the time to check that you’re telling the truth. Put a friend’s phone number down as an “old boss”, or bump up your degree, whatever you need to do. Just make sure you actually have the skills you claim to have.

EDIT: agree with these comments that even if you don’t have the skills you claim to have, be willing to learn them FAST! That’s actually exactly what I did when I first got into my industry now that I think about it. They never suspected a thing lol.

Image credits: Warm_Cricket_929

#38

If you are in the middle of a war it is okay to buy and sell things on the black market. That includes buying and selling things like salt or met. The black market isn’t always about things that are unethical like guns or d***s. Sometimes it can be about everyday items most of us have access to now.

You do you when the world around you is falling apart.

#39

If you mail a letter without a stamp with the return address as the actual address you want it go, they will “return” it to the return address. ?.

#40

There’s Mcdelivery in my country, and if you order directly from McDonald’s for delivery, you can call them to inform that the french fries are soggy, or that you did not receive your order. They will re-send your order to you with no questions asked. Ordered a big mac with fries? Now you’ve got 2 burgers and fries instead.

#41

[A life hack to make friends as an Adult.](https://youtu.be/DRJoZowpyLw?si=uViupEJlYFkAXKHj) If you don’t want to watch that here’s a quick breakdown:

If you’re having trouble making friends as an adult, simply make a fake tinder profile using girl-next-door type pictures and suddenly you’ll have a bunch of guys messaging you wanting to get to know you so you just get to know them right back and eventually set up a date at a nearby pub. Arrive at the pub 15 minutes early and post up in an inconspicuous spot. When the friend arrives watch them for a bit as the reality that they’ve been stood up sinks in, walk over and ask them if they just got stood up and offer to buy them a drink. Stick around and steer the conversation towards your shared interests. By the end of the night you’ll have a new friend.

#42

If you have a damaged product that is past its return date, buy it again, claim it arrived damaged, then return the damaged one.

#43

Literally, just don’t ever pay EMERGENCY OR URGENT CARE medical bills. They can’t do s**t to you, and it barely affects your credit. Since yall are stupid and can’t use context clues based on the post. Even my dentist can’t sue for not paying bills. Clearly you are talking about very different situations. Let the poor people talk we know what we’re talking about lmao.

#44

I don’t know how consistently this would work, but many years ago I stopped paying my cable bill, they shut it off and put a tag on my door to address it. I waited a couple days, called them and said I’d been out of the country for months and had called to have the service suspended before I left. Past due bill gone just like that, and service restored the same day.

#45

You don’t actually have to be a violent sociopath to make people believe you can snap at any moment and make them behave accordingly.

#46

If you own a restaurant make fake dating profiles and lure Women and Men to your restaurant to Sunken Cost fallacy them for increased profits during your less busy times of year!

This is actually something Restaurants are doing. If you get stood up at a food place just get up and leave. They probably baited you in to buy the food.

#47

Ladies, if you’re having a casual sexual encounter, Tell the guy that no other man has made you cum from oral/PIV/whatever it is you want him to do.

He’ll probably take it as a challenge.

When he gets you off, act impressed like this is the first time it’s ever happened.

Gives him a nice sense of achievement and you have nice orgasms.

#48

If you’re any major city pick the nicest hotel you can find and walk in like you’re staying there. Use the bathrooms as they are often very nice and with little pressure to rush. My primary source is the 4 seasons bathroom in downtown SF, top tier, has those tough paper towels that are so nice to use.

#49

If you have a sunroof in your vehicle you can toss pennies straight up towards the sky while driving and by the time they fall down it’ll hit the windshield of the a*****e tailgating behind you with enough force to crack it.

#50

If you’re sober, not using a cell phone, it’s a stranger, and you don’t run away, you can purposefully kill a pedestrian or cyclist with your car and chalk it up to an accident. It works especially well in New York City.

https://freakonomics.com/podcast/the-perfect-crime/

https://freakonomics.com/podcast/why-is-the-u-s-so-good-at-killing-pedestrians/.
Source: boredpanda.com